don’t get me wrong, graduate school is great. but it is also full of strangers and, at this point, down time. so i’ve figured out a new favorite school activity: hiding.
obviously i don’t actually know anyone here so i’m not hiding from some one specific. more like i’m hiding from everyone. like making myself invisible by wearing gray clothes and sitting silently on a bench (i learned that technic from the national inquirer story “become invisible!”). but there are other ways to make sure people aren’t looking at you! one good one is hide in stairwells. stairwells are like eddies in a fast moving river of scary humans. unless they are popular stairwells in which case they are more like waterfalls. the best stairwells attach to things like the back of dorms or loading docks in the middle of the afternoon. they aren’t too hard to find. i’ve already hid in at least 10 today.
another good way to hide, a really obvious way, is put on your headphones and BELIEVE everyone away. it’s especially good if you have a laptop and the third season of arrested development. there were two hours this afternoon, between the 12pm class i dropped and the 5pm class that i’m going to shortly, in which i actually forgot that other people existed. it was great!
now i don’t want you to think i am sad or lonely and that is why i am hiding. what i am doing is killing time until something happens. it’s working! something is about to happen! short story class! i can’t wait! i’ve got to go!
****post script**** A WHOLE NEW REASON TO HIDE:
hey, guess what, it turns out that my class WASN’T at 5pm. no, in fact 19:00 means 7pm. which i now know because i showed up to “my class” at 5 which was apparently, strangely, late because the teacher was half way through role and when she finished and asked me my name and then couldn’t find it, i was a little confused. until she said, “this is ‘developing the novel,'” which led to my quick exit and a good laugh for the whole entire class. really funny. i don’t even think i did anything that stupid in middle school.