hey, i figured out what you want!

so pete and i are really amazing at a lot of different things. like, he’s good at sculptures and i’m good at shame. these pictures should show you one of our mutual talents: shirt making. one day soon pete and i will be selling these (and other unbelievably hip) tshirts for way more money than you will be able to afford. but if you want one right now, while we are still all underground, well, let me know. we can work some deal out in which i convince pete to make you a shirt for free and you give me your surfboard or food stamps or oakland a’s baseball cards and we promise each other to never tell pete that happened.

look, these shirts are about to get f-ing huge. i’m sort of embarrassed for you that you don’t have one already.