oh clementine

[if i had cute kids i would post pictures of them. but i don’t and my cousin does. so i post pictures of her kids, okay?]

i realized at some point this evening that i am in a sort of good mood. i cannot figure out why. i was completely out of it at work all afternoon. like the kind of out of it where i had to recheck addresses i was inputting in the database 4 or 5 times because i kept forgetting the numbers in the .03 seconds it took me to look from the paper where they were written to the keyboard of my computer. i signed up for some promotion on the internet and only realized after i was almost done with it that i had made a terrible mistake. now i have a subscription to the new york times and a postage service that i have to cancel and i am pretty sure there is no way i will be getting 2 ipod nanos in the mail because i realized what was going on before i registered for the cool blue mastercard. later, on the muni, i remembered that i had left the ipod i DO own on my desk at work and only realized after about 6 calls to the poetry center intern that no, i hadn’t REMEMBERED leaving my ipod, i had FORGOTTEN putting it into my bag.

i’m on mars or something. but in a good mood.

maybe i’m happy because i finally rewrote my shakespeare paper the way i wanted to and sent it to my ta along with a note telling her exactly why i was not going to write “clear topic sentences for each paragraph.” and i didn’t use the words “i didn’t even like 6th grade in 6th grade.” meaning i was verging on gracious.

or maybe it’s because last night i saw titanic on tbs for the first time in years and i remembered that even though so many people hate that movie, i was never one of those people. i love everything about titanic: the imaginary historical situation, james cameron’s crazy craziness, leonardo dicaprio and kate winslet falling love in about 10 and half seconds, the hand in the steam in the car window, the crying, the totally terrifying water level issues, the totally terrifying boat snapping in half issues, the frame story and bill paxton’s extremely uncool earring, that moment when the old lady throws the diamond into the ocean and someone starts moaning the tune to that once-overplayed-now-practically-perfect celine dion song. i wasn’t even that irritated by jack’s (and everybody else’s) complete disregard for hypothermia prevention protocol. why didn’t they huddle? well maybe it was because in the olden days they didn’t have red cross certified lifeguards hanging out all over the place. i’m totally willing to believe that is an historically accurate representation of the behavior of the people who jumped off the boat. i love titanic and that is just the way it is. seriously. it is one satisfying movie.

also it has my current all time favorite actress and that is kate winslet. which reminds me: if you haven’t seen little children then the only person you are hurting is you. it might be the best movie of the year. (and i mean real best movie, not titanic-style best movie.) also the most disturbing. but since i think one of the most interesting ideas in literature or film is the complications in reality with the idea of evil, then for me it was a great great movie. but if you don’t like feeling uncomfortable and you think anyone who tries to talk about the humanity of people who are also bad is trying to tear down civilization, then you should probably NOT watch little children. but if you liked in the bedroom, well this is better. and todd field is from portland so what are you waiting for?

anyway, what i am saying is that for some reason i am feeling happy and it’s probably some hormone problem but i’m going with it. until tomorrow. tomorrow i have poetry class. if i am still happy after poetry class, i am taking myself to a hospital.