hugs, in the future

last night i worked at a reading with amiri baraka and roscoe mitchell (on saxophone). this was the second reading i’ve worked that is part of this collaboration between the poetry center (where i work) and a local journal focused on the african diaspora. both of them have been an interesting change on the usual old-white-people-still-into-the-beats crowd of most poetry center events. these last two readings have both involved music, which i like a lot. they’ve also involved a certain amount of hating on white people. and condoleezza rice. which is interesting and weird. right when i came back from south africa i used to get really offended when i heard anything that generally classified white people as the bad guys. it still kind of bugs me. i mean, i’ve never been part of a lynch mob and while it’s possible that some distant far back relation of mine was, i don’t see how that is relevant. defining whole groups of people as “bad” and “good” is too dangerous i think. it doesn’t force anyone to think about what they are doing in a critical way. because we are all sort of evil right? and kind of good? be more specific, that’s all i ask. i still laughed at a lot of the jokes at my expense. but i for some reason can’t help feeling that they were at my expense.

afterwards i went with the undergraduate bookstore employee to a bar down the street that lets you put your bikes inside. it’s a bicycle bar. the last time i went there with my friend jim and all his bike messenger friends i embarrassed myself pretty severely. this time i kept it together, mainly for the benefit of this 21-year-old boy. i have a responsibility to the youth of america to act like it means something to be 25. plus he gave me some information on this whole hyphy movement that i’ve been passively wondering about for like 6 months but have never found the energy to ask about or look up. he promised to burn me a hyphy cd. and he seemed impressed by the fact that i am a ta. he also knew some mountain goats lyrics and we sang them together at the bar, and he likes kurt vonnegut. is it weird to be friends with someone who is in his first few months of legal alcohol consumption? because even though i usually am completely against 21-year-olds of any gender doing anything, this one seemed pretty cool. or maybe this is just an indicator that i am becoming one of those old ladies that my friends who were boys were always so into when THEY were 21. the kid asked me if i was 30. i could be that girl. the 30-year-old who leaves suggestive notes to young waiters at fancy restaurants in the pearl district. you know what i am talking about.

anyway, i am going to meet claremarie at the swimming pool. that’s just how i roll. 30 rock is quickly becoming much better than the office. it’s time we all came to terms with that. al gore is on this week’s show. watch it on the internet but don’t expect me to link to it. do i look like a corporate whore to you? i’m more like greenzo: hey kids, hold your breath. now do it forever.