i’m watching anne of green gables: the sequel in which anne melts the hearts of many, many cold, uptight canadians with her straightforward manner and religious adherence to what is right. my feelings, as always, are mixed. i love how she is like a vanquishing hero for happiness and fun, bring joy and common sense wherever she goes. but i am worried that this fantasy is what lead me on my fruitless crusade to integrate the mr. spartan pageant in 1997. what was i thinking? what would they call it? girls aren’t funny! anne shirley, as well as the constant positive support from my family and the other strong willed soldiers for honestly and logic i admired in literature (francie nolan, harriet the spy, jo march, kristy thomas) and my favorite movie of all time (scout), lead me to believe if i stood up for the right thing, people would notice and change. of course, i may have missed the point. for example, what did scout really do? and francie missed out on true love because she didn’t bone a dude when she should have. and everyone basically hated harriet. and i am beginning to think that lucy maud montgomery’s thesis was “have some fun but GET MARRIED AND HAVE KIDS OR ELSE YOUR LIFE WILL BE UTTERLY DEVOID OF MEANING.” it is interesting to learn about the lives of authors even if it is sort of forbidden in some types of criticism. like i just learned via wikipedia that lucy maude montgomery may have committed suicide. two days ago i learned that orson scott card hates gay people. so. never have three names. and is biography relevant?
ANYway. this is all sounding bitter. like i am blaming books for a failure i had when i was a sophomore in high school, over ten years ago. is my life now really so bad? and am i just an inherently, overwhelmingly negative person? no. however. i am pretty critical. and today i feel extra critical. what is WITH the world? why do i have to go to work tomorrow? blah. nonsense. and anne shirley is entertaining me but also bugging me a bit. i can imagine lucy maude getting older, publishing the first book and then getting married. what did she lose then? i don’t know. i will continue the investigation. how many hearts will anne melt before i go to sleep?