triple double

this may be one of the worst pictures i have ever taken of myself.  and yet, i put it on the internet.  you should know i am capable of making this face.  someone should know.

i am going to eugene tomorrow so i am listening to girl talk, trying to find some secret messages, cleaning my house, finishing up this wine i opened god only knows when.  it’s good wine, from the farm, though SOMEone recently told me that not even wine experts can tell the difference between good wine and bad wine in blind taste tests, so i am drinking it and acknowledging i have no fucking clue what good wine tastes like.

today had a minor disaster in it: i paid one of my student loans, the big one, and APPARENTLY I HAD ALREADY SET UP AN AUTOMATIC DEDUCTION.  when did i do this?  why does the website not tell me that i have done this?  there is technology that allows you to point your cellphone at a sign in another language and it just translates it, like that, and yet?  direct loans cannot notify me that i don’t need to pay my loan because i already will be, automatically.  soooo, my student loan, THE BIG ONE, came out twice, impossibly because i am actually pretty broke and $400 once is a lot, twice is rent.  direct loans may have the worst customer service in the world.  “customer service” is a loose term, more like “indentured servant complaint line to nowhere.”  i imagine the people at the call center deal with sobbing girls all day long and they don’t even care anymore.  they are like, “no, this is the only place you can call.  and we can MAYBE give you a refund in 2 to 6 weeks.  we’ll see.  call back next week.”

i was just disappointed because i thought i was so together this month.  and i don’t actually have the money they took from me and there is nothing sadder than red numbers proceeded by a minus sign.  oh well.  i am so lucky that i have parents who can help me out in a pinch.  i know they are the source of my problems, because they had the temerity to bring me into this tragic world, but they also don’t have to be so goddamn nice about it.

i really love my parents.

anyway, after work i went downtown because i really needed (“needed” is not the correct word but it makes me feel better) something to wear with the sparkly skirt for christmas eve and also my epic book tour on which i will be required to look fabulous for 10 straight days (see above picture, i am working on it, obviously).

i found something, pretty cheap, but it took a couple hellish hours in downtown sf where i was thinking only in snarky tweets.  messed up.  i need a serious twitter detox program.  also it meant i missed yoga and i didn’t go to yoga yesterday either and won’t be able to go until monday.  i think this actually might be good.  i’ve been going a little hard lately and my knees are sore.  i know how pathetic that sounds if you haven’t done yoga.  sorry.  you’re wrong.

at the mall i got this email on my phone that i was not going to read until i got home.  i think one problem with smart phones is that some things require FULL ATTENTION and this email was like that and i was holding off and holding off and then got on bart and couldn’t take it anymore.  and the email was pretty good so i missed my stop and rode all the way to glen park and had to get off and go back in the right direction.  lesson: i was right.  some emails can wait til you get home.

i laughed a lot to myself about this in the glen park station.  i think it will be good when i have a roommate again because i have started making a lot of sounds to myself.  i would be bad on a deserted island.  i would go crazy like 20 minutes in.

anyway, i guess it’s almost christmas.  my family is doing this name drawing thing this year which i have already ignored by finding things around my house for every single person.  but i got something with actually money for my real person so i hope they forgive me.  the only real joy i get out of christmas is giving people weird presents with cryptic things written on the outside so i will just tell them letting me do this is their christmas gift to me.

oh god.  okay.  girl talk.  i wish someone else was here for a dance party.  maybe i can invite the neighbors over.  happy december 22nd!