Yes Means Yes

The Tusk


Recently my Facebook feed has lit up with narratives from women in the lit community writing about sexual assault on Tumblr and Medium, naming names of people who have abused them and telling their stories. People are sharing these narratives and supporting the women and starting movements and holding meetings and in some ways, I think this whole thing is great—not the assault part obviously but the community building part, the coming together and trying to change things part. In some ways though, I have found this whole thing exceptionally distressing—what are the consequences of naming someone an abuser online? How do we as women take responsibility for ourselves while demanding accountability from men WITHOUT vilifying half the population? How do we talk about sexual abuse and assault in an honest and open way without victim blaming or turning into a mindless angry mob?

A couple of the stories I have…

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